There are a number of ways to improve assertiveness skills. For many, assertiveness is very important and displays how well you handle yourself under stress. While assertiveness can be a valued asset, it can also lead to poor communication if not used properly. If you think you are not assertive enough, take some time to consider the following tips for improving assertiveness. By doing so, you will find yourself communicating more effectively and managing stress in your life in a new and positive way.
In order to succeed at assertiveness skills, make sure you know how to communicate your thoughts and feelings in an assertive but polite manner. Passive speakers tend to feel very uncomfortable when their opinions and suggestions are put forward in this way. Instead, assertiveness skills work best when they are spoken with total confidence and authority. Using too much force or yelling can set off alarms in others that may cause feelings of anger, fear and even jealousy.
Another important part of building assertiveness skills involves the body posture and facial expression. The body posture should be straight, with head up and shoulders back. When a person is talking, their shoulders should slightly nod while eyes dangle a bit to one side. A confident person rarely stares down at someone or holds their head down. In fact, a good communication tool to use when communicating is to tilt the head slightly to the side as a sign of submission or negotiation.
The level of communication in your relationship plays a critical role in assertiveness skills. If you find yourself getting frustrated over seemingly small issues, it could be that you lack the ability to be assertive when you need to. To improve this skill, take the time to really understand what your partner says to you, how you say it and how it affects them emotionally. This is a great way to increase your understanding of how communication works and to become more effective in using it in your relationships.
While learning assertiveness skills, it is also helpful to learn how to maintain effective eye contact. Many people are afraid of staring and want to avoid eye contact so that they do not look like an aggressor. However, in order to be successful it is important to be open and give your partner the space they need to clear their minds. Instead of trying to avoid contact, maintain a constant level of eye contact as much as possible so that your partner knows that you are interested in what they are saying.
The most important thing to remember when learning assertiveness skills is that everyone has their own ideas about how things should be done and will never truly agree on how things should be done. Therefore, in order to be successful assertiveness needs to be compatible with everyone’s idea of a successful outcome. You may have to compromise on some things in order to get what you want. However, by being flexible and accepting of other opinions you will greatly increase your chances of success. When you are confident and able to communicate your needs effectively you will come off as much more respectful and trustworthy to your partner.