The ability to assertiveness can be one of the most beneficial self-help skills anyone can learn. You can use assertiveness skills to deal with difficult people, yourself, and situations around you. How do you know if you’re assertiveness skills are working for you? There are a variety of tests you can take. Here are some examples.
A simple test is by asking how assertive a person feels during a conversation with a friend, family member, or coworker. Another way is to have the person give a speech and rate how assertive he or she felt during the process. You can also ask someone who is less assertive to rate how assertive they feel and then compare that to your own rating. These are just two ways of testing assertiveness skills and gauging them.
The first step in assertiveness is knowing when and how you’re assertiveness skills will serve you best. If you’re assertiveness seems to be working for you, then that’s wonderful! If you find that assertiveness doesn’t help you, though, consider changing your habits. This is one area where you can practice assertiveness on your own.
When practicing assertiveness skills, you’ll need to take into account how you say things and what kind of response you’re looking for. Sometimes you may not want to argue with someone. In those cases, simply maintaining eye contact can make a big difference. This shows that you value the other person’s perspective, and that you know that you’re in a better position than the other person to address the issue. A confident person knows their position and can easily communicate it.
As you practice assertiveness, you’ll quickly recognize when you’ve been assertive and when you’ve been passive. And you can use these simple tools to work toward correcting those behaviors. If you’re assertiveness seems to be working well, but you don’t want to argue with someone, consider offering a neutral response or waiting for them to argue before responding. Either way, assertiveness gives you a powerful presence–one that’s more likely to get people’s attention. And it can help you establish a healthy balance in relationships. It shows that you respect your partner’s point of view and can see that they’re more important than getting your own way.
So, if assertiveness seems like something you have a little trouble developing, try some simple exercises to improve your assertiveness skills. Assertiveness is an important personality trait and learning it can be good for you. You just need to practice it often. Plus, if you’re not sure that you’re doing it right, there are lots of great books and videos out there that can help you with your assertiveness skills. Just do some research and get started today!